Elective egg freezing allows women to stop their biological clocks

When Mary Smith was 35 years old she and her husband divorced. She wanted kids, but he did not. Once Smith was single again, her strong desire to start a family put unavoidable pressure on any new relationship.
"It freaks men out when you walk around like a ticking biological clock," Smith said. "Even if I met somebody today, it takes a while to get to know someone. The pressure would be there from day one."
In January, Smith took her fertility into her own hands. She had her eggs frozen to give herself more time to find a partner before having children.
A new option
While egg freezing was once only recommended to women facing medical crises like cancer, the technology is now allowing healthy women to electively preserve their fertility and delay motherhood.
Egg freezing is one method of in-vitro fertilization (IVF). Most commonly, IVF is done by removing eggs from a woman, fertilizing them in a lab with sperm, and then transferring them into the women’s uterus. The process can also be done by fertilizing eggs and then freezing them as embryos for later use. Or, women can freeze eggs without fertilizing them for pregnancy with an undetermined partner later in life.
Doctors have been freezing eggs since 1986. However, up until October the practice was considered experimental by the American Society for Reproductive Medicine.
Before mounting research on the success of egg freezing caused the society to remove that label, many doctors believed women would have better luck getting pregnant if they fertilized their eggs before freezing them. For women without a partner, this meant using donor sperm.
At age 37, Smith still hopes to meet a partner. Fertilizing her eggs with a stranger’s sperm would have prevented her from having her future husband's child one day. So, she traveled from Canada to Seattle to find a clinic that would freeze her eggs without fertilizing them.
"If I'd had to decide on a donor right now I would not have been ready to make that decision," she said.
Smith also could have used traditional IVF and donor sperm to become pregnant immediately, but as a business owner with a demanding career she did not feel comfortable becoming a parent on her own.
Lab director Amin Khabani opens a freezer containing frozen eggs, courtesy Pacific Northwest Fertility. |
"If it wasn't for the fact that I own a company I would get pregnant now," Smith said. "Freezing my eggs buys me a couple more years to find someone."
Dr. Julie Lamb, a physician at Pacific Northwest Fertility in Seattle, said her clinic has led women through enough successful pregnancies using frozen eggs that they recommend it as an elective procedure to women who qualify. Nationally, she estimates 1,000 babies have been born from frozen eggs.
"It's something we feel a lot more comfortable doing now that we have had so many successful pregnancies and deliveries," Lamb said.
The future of egg freezing
Another physician at the clinic, Dr. Lorna Marshall, believes elective egg freezing will become more common in the future, just as birth control measures became mainstream years ago. She said as more women strive for successful, professional careers their process of having a family gets delayed.
"For a professional woman it is going to be a stress reliever," Marshall said. "A lot of women see this time fly by them, and they may have enough income to consider something like this."
Smith said egg freezing has become a common conversation topic among her colleagues.
"There's a lot of pressure on women that having a career is the only acceptable way to go and that graduating to become a homemaker is a failure," Smith said. "I feel like since I got pushed on the path of having a career this is the logical consequence."
Cost concerns
The cost of egg freezing is prohibitive for many women. The process costs around $15,000 per ovulation cycle and it is not covered by most insurance plans. Women also pay about $500 per year to store their eggs.
Cancer patients get a slightly decreased rate and have more financial aid opportunities to help cover the cost of egg freezing.
Even though Smith could afford the cost of egg freezing, she said buying her more time to become a mother was worth any price.
"In the grand scheme of things, do I want a new bag or clothes, or do I want to start a family?" she said. "Clearly, this is more important."
Age limitations
Both Marshall and Lamb advise that egg freezing is not an ideal fertility option for women over 37. While the doctors will implant the thawed, fertilized eggs in women as old as 50, they say the success of implantation depends on the age at which the eggs were harvested.
Like retirement saving, Marshall said it is best not to wait too long before freezing eggs.
"This is not something for women in their 40s," Marshall said. "By then it’s too late."
No matter when a women freezes her eggs, pregnancy is not guaranteed. Marshall said that for each successfully thawed and fertilized egg there is a 50 percent to 70 percent chance it will lead to a pregnancy.
Smith is well aware of the odds.
"I know I might not get a baby at the end of it," Smith. "But it’s all I can do at this point. It gave me peace of mind."
Taking a risk
There are medical risks to women who become pregnant later in life. Marshall said women are at higher risk of developing diabetes, hypertension or high blood pressure after 45. At Pacific Northwest Fertility, anyone over 40 who wants to become pregnant must consult with a high-risk obstetrician.
The egg-freezing process also has risks. Ovary-stimulating hormones used in all in-vitro fertilization can lead to bloating and blood clots, though Marshall said the risk is small.
"We don't want it to be used frivolously," Marshall said. "Even though it's no longer considered experimental we still don't know all the risks."
In some ways, there are fewer ethical concerns tied to egg freezing than with embryo freezing, Marshall said. If patients don't use their frozen eggs, she said they tend to have fewer concerns discarding them than they might have discarding frozen embryos.
Still, Marshall said legal issues regarding frozen eggs can be complicated. For example, there is currently no legal precedent determining whether eggs are joint property in a marriage. It is unknown whether one or both partners have control over their use.
Despite these concerns, Marshall said she is happy to offer women any option that gives them greater control over their reproduction.
Ed. Note: We have changed the name of the woman referred to as Mary Smith upon her request.
Why do women have a selfish need to breed? We live in an overpopulated society as it is. There are thousands of children who need good homes. Just adopt and stop being so pathetic.Â
"It freaks men out when you walk around like a ticking biological clock" Geez. I wonder why. Should you get pregnant, they get to have their wages garnished for 18 years. And when you determine you want a divorce and the pro-female court system grants you sole custody, forces him to dish out alimony and strips him of seeing his kids more than 2.0 hours a month so you can keep the dream while he finances it, I simply don't understand why men would be freaked out. Â
It's great that she wants to plan all this out, but in reality having children never goes as planned.  Honestly as a woman  (a former single mom) and now a wife and mother of 4, I know you have to choose.  It's the hardest job on earth to be a "stay at home mom".  It's easy to drop them off at daycare.  They don't mess up the house, you don't have to feed them, change their diapers, deal with crying for say 8-9hrs out of the day.  I could have a career for myself but my kids would suffer.  They need a mom who can spend time with them, that is how it's supposed to be.  I realize that some people have to do what they have to do and if they make sure their children are in a safe environment, that is their choice.  Society has evolved from women staying home with their children and now having careers, but society isn't what it used to be either.  This woman is taking all the natural out of having a child to prolong a clock that she maybe didn' t realize she had control of earlier.
@keri555Â Yes. It's just so tough spending lots of time with your children rather than spending lots of hours away from them at a job you hate, huh keri? You can do this since you have a hubby who financially supports you. Oh. And when you deem him no longer needed around the house, can divorce him, garnish his wages college alimony so your dream lives on. Hardest job on earth is being a stay at home mom? Huh. Why don't you tell that to the men on frontlines who are away from their children while their wives cheat on them and then take them to the cleaners when they come home.Â
@keri555Â You are fortunate to have a husband who supported you so that you could be a stay at home mother. Try being a little humble and appreciative of what you have been given - most women are not so lucky.
Mary tried doing what she thought was right. She did what most people think of as natural and got married, but her husband didn't want children. Her husband was the selfish one. The only mistake Mary made was in chosing a man that did not want children. Give her a break will ya. Mary does not want to do things unnatally, no woman does, it's just the cards she has been dealt. She is not perfect and neither are you.
Very well said. I can imagine that you are very close to your children & visa versa.
Mary, I have been in your boat. Do not go to Pacific NW Fertility. Go to Seattle Reproductive Medicine.
When I was your age I too delayed having a child in hopes of finding an honorable man. Donât wait - you will have a hard time finding an honorable man who will step up to the plate. Men arenât honorable anymore. Sad, but true. There are a few, but they are rare. Donât wait. An honorable man will love a child that is not biologically his.
Do no listen to the criticism here. You cannot win with these critics. In their eyes you are a failure whether you have a career or not. You are a career woman because that is what society has told us - that we should be career woman because you cannot rely on a manâs income.
Good luck in your future, and remember, when you are ready, go to SRM.
@Vinnie LOL, yep women are all perfect and it's all men's fault that they don't want to have kids to take care of from another man, or no man, with a self absorbed little girl who never grew up. Puh-leeease. Â
I feel sorry for the poor children that get popped out of older women who don't have the desire nor time to properly care for them; they are simply a lame attempt to fill a hole in an empty life devoid of meaning or purpose. Poor children that will watch their inattentive single parent die before they graduate college, that they will have no meaningful relationship with. Sounds peachy. World's going to pot anyways to let's add fuel to the fire and bring a child into misery.....how despicable. And men are the ones without honor?
@dg54321 @Vinnie Mary's honor is intact. If not, then she would have gotten pregnant against the wishes of her husband and we wouldn't be reading about her now.
@dg54321 @Vinnie You don't know what you are talking about. People who have children later in life are becoming extremely common. Children born to older parents are often more educated because the parents have the resources to send them to college (vs babies who have babies). Children born to older parents are often more loved because they are wanted and planned. Older parents make great financial and emotional sacrifices to get them, because of that they cherish them.
You are cruel and ignorant, and likely the reason why so many women chose a cat. lol
With advise like that... Who needs a critic???
If she can support the child and give it a good loving home, more power to her. I'd rather her be a parent anyday over these welfare rats that I am having to support with my taxes. I know a few women who have had children late in life (both single and married) and they are excellent mothers with great kids.Â
@The WA Mama The problem I have is when the people put their career over their children.  What is the point of having a child if you are not going to spend any time with it?  My brother in-law and his wife had a kid and three weeks afterwards dumped him in a day care until he was old enough to go to school. The kid was put into all kinds of time consuming activities (away from them).  He was home for maybe an hour before bedtime.  The kid might as well have been an orphan.
@K. Coleman Congrats! You have just insulted every working mother out there.Â
Considering that most households are dual income and only the minority can actually afford to have one person stay home without working, your argument is pretty moot.Â
I'm not going to get into a working vs not working mother debate with you. Each family has to decide what works best for them.
@The WA Mama Saying K. Coleman just insulted working moms because she spoke the truth in nuts.Â
@The WA Mama @justsaying My mom worked from when I was a baby, up until I was in 7th grade. The times I was not in school, I spent bouncing around from daycare, grandma's house, or other various after school activities. I can assure you, it sucked. There is no way to have a career and still be a good parent. Sorry to break it to you. If someone truly wants kids, choose them. Not a career. You really cant have both.
@justsaying @The WA Mama I do. I am married, have great kids and I have worked the entire time I've had them. Yes, I can have it all and I do.
@The WA Mama Yes. . . but look at what is happening to society. I wonder if there is any correlation to the change in the nuclear family. . . it just might be possible that we CAN'T have it all.Â
Looks like the 101st Mansplaining Brigade has made its appearance.
You own a business, are middle aged and past your prime and may or may not have a partner to help raise the child....and you want to have one anyways? Talk about selfish. You chose your career over family, lady......now live with the consequences of your choices. Don't bring a child that will be neglected or live to see their parents die at a young age into this world. It just doesn't work out well for the kid. We have enough screwed up children in this world already without adding more. Get a cat like lonely old women have been doing for ages.
@dg54321 I agree 100%. I see women every day who choose to have children to fill an empty void; they just "want something to love them". Women are crazy. Kids are not a necessity, and should only be brought into the world by someone who has planned for them and is going to stay at home with them. I have chosen not to have children because I want a career. You really can't have both.
And yes, I am a woman.
Okay, now you can have a kid when your 50, so what, you might die before the kid graduates high school. Â While all of your friends parents are doing cool things with them, your parents are too darn feeble and slow to keep up with them.Â
Yes, good for you!  Willingly bring a child in to the world with  no father. That generally works out well.
Tick, tick, tick...
@Getov Mylon No, good for you! You didn't even read the article did you.  That generally works out well, doesn't it.
@doubleoevan
"'It freaks men out when you walk around like a ticking biological clock," Smith said."
She nailed that one.Â
@therunner  She is hitting for the Maternity Fence on the first at-bat. Shudder...
There are lots of guys out there who also want a family. It's the women who try to marry after only a few months that freak men out.
@lakeview "Go mock the 17 year old single mothers on welfare."
Oh, like I haven't done my "fair share" on that?
So she owns her own company and wants kids and is fairly desperate to do it. Exactly what is the make up of a man that would be amenable to that? The Talent Pool that would be seeking a closing-in-on-middle-age executive that works 60-80 hours a week that wants you to support her decision to procreate is rather small. And who also will be on the hook for child support once it doesn't work out, like with her first husband. Explain exactly what is in it for him? Unless he is maybe like Michelle Bachmann's or Little Gregoire's husbands? If-as she says-her first marriage ended because  her husband didn't want kids, she probably agreed to that when they were married  but later changed her mind. Shocking, I know.
@Getov Mylon Uh...there's really no reason to mock her. She's in her late 30s. Go mock the 17 year old single mothers on welfare.Â
@Getov Mylon Sounds to me from the article that she has been doing everything possible to have a child with someone she meets. If she wanted to raise a kid without a dad present, she wouldn't be freezing her eggs.Â
@lakeview Yeah, I don't smell any desperation, do you? Bet none of her "dates" sussed it out either.
"There's a lot of pressure on women that having a career is the only acceptable way to go and that graduating to become a homemaker is a failure," Smith said. "I feel like since I got pushed on the path of having a career this is the logical consequence."
There is absolutely ZERO pressure to have a career  from most any man. None. Blame your sisters.
And notice the typical Estrogen Syndrome response? It's not my fault. Somebody else is responsible for my decisions. Run men! RUUUUNNNN!
@Getov Mylon @lakeview You got a "like" from Truth Percolate. Why hasn't that guy created a new account yet? Hey Truth, you're banned buddy...we can't read your comments. We miss you...