SEATTLE -- You know what they say: When God closes a door, he opens a window. Unfortunately, burglars often climb through those open windows. Here are 23 burglaries reported this month in the Puget Sound area.
Aug. 1 in Capitol Hill: Burglar steals $1,000 to $3,000 worth of custom hand-painted high heels from local artist.
Aug. 5 in Rainier Beach: Burglar caught in victim's apartment explains he was "there to buy rabbits."
Aug. 6 in Tacoma: Burglar arrested for stealing towels from house. Towels are undoubtedly the most boring thing you could be arrested for stealing.
Aug. 7 in Queen Anne: Burglar apparently started stealing unicycle before thinking better of it. It was the correct decision for a number of reasons.
Aug. 7 in Beacon Hill: Burglary victim's "home is somewhat cluttered, however she stated she is very familiar with her clutter."
Aug. 8 in Downtown Seattle: Burglary victim says her laptop was stolen, but it was a Dell and not worth very much.
Aug. 10 in White Center: Movers find burglar just hanging out on couch and watching TV.
Aug. 12 in North Seattle: Burglar breaks into business then accidentally locks himself into a storage room. Burglar breaks out of business.
Aug. 12 in Capitol Hill: Victim says burglars plugged in alarm clock, moved clothes, knocked over rocks piled on table. Victim admits cat possibly responsible for knocking over rock pile.
Aug. 13 in the U-District: Woman leaves her window open so her boyfriend can get in. Burglars get in instead.
Aug. 14 in Delridge: Burglary victim suspects his ex-wife stole his laptop because she thinks there may be nude pictures of her on it.
Aug. 14 in Waterville: Burglar steals jewelry, bulletproof vests, diving and hunting equipment, knives, ammo and more from deputy's home.
Aug. 15 in Dunlap: Burglar ate some of victim's Honey Buns.
Aug. 16 in Spokane: A mother/son burglary team was arrested after stealing marijuana plants from a pot shop.
Aug. 17 in Capitol Hill: "Suspect used long pole to reach into [victim's] apartment. Suspect attempted to take [victim's] pants."
Aug. 17 in the U-District: Police list value lost in burglary as $300,000. It turns out it was 300,000 South Korean Won, which is more like $300.
Aug. 17 in Magnolia: Grocery store burglar appeared to only be interested in tequila (and not the expensive stuff either).
Aug. 20 in Olympic Hills: $1,800 to $3,000 worth of Nike Air Jordans and a bag of marijuana reported missing from burglarized apartment.
Aug. 21 in Maple Leaf: Home burglarized while resident played video games with headphones on.
Aug. 22 in Georgetown: Burglar steals a dozen old safety vests from pavement repair company.
Aug. 23 in Pinehurst: Burglars may have entered home through any one of a dozen windows left open. According to police, that's far too many windows left open.
Aug. 24 in Delridge: Man living in a basement room below a church was burgled three times this month. He says the church's pastor told him not to call police following each incident.
Unknown August date in Bremerton: Couple tells police they suspect a burglar pooped on their bed. Police suspect the couple's guilty-looking dog.
For more crimes in brief, follow Michael Harthorne on Twitter @MHarthorneKOMO.