Shutting down the house: 'Jersey Shore' ending run

NEW YORK (AP) - "Train wreck."
That's what I hear, again and again, when I ask people why they watch "Jersey Shore."
"It's such a train wreck!" they chortle.
I nod blankly and change the subject.
Am I missing the essential train-wreckiness that has made "Jersey Shore" such an audience-pleasing, buzz-generating hit? Or is my immunity to its charms explained simply by the fact that if I wanted to watch a train wreck, I'd choose a swifter railroad?
But this will all be moot soon. After three years and six seasons of boozy, rowdy wrecktitude, "Jersey Shore" concludes its MTV run Thursday at 10 p.m. EST.
Can it really be just three years since Snooki and memes like "smoosh" and "G.T.L." drilled their way into our consciousness? Since a group of millenial party animals challenged Speaker of the House John Boehner as the nation's reigning orange public figure?
Did Barbara Walters really include the "Jersey Shore" gang among her "10 Most Fascinating People" list in 2010? (Did she figure that the full cast of eight might add up to a single fascinating person?)
These, and so many other questions, will be deferred for anyone who might be mulling them, after Thursday.
For the moment, it suffices to just marvel at this phenomenon, which convened these housemates - four brawny dudes, four bosomy gals - at the Jersey Shore (and elsewhere as the series wore on), then, with cameras rolling, turned them loose to be themselves and get their dumb on.
There's been plenty of G.T.L. (gym, tanning, laundry) during the show's run. Plus drinking and messing around, of course, and random stabs at verbal self-expression. (Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino: "I got the shirt, but I ain't wearing the shirt when I go out. This is the shirt before the shirt.")
I can guess why anthropologically inclined viewers might have taken to "Jersey Shore." Here is an opportunity to study a primitive life form as it feeds, mates and struggles to communicate. (Ronnie Ortiz-Magro: "Why do you even bother? You're only gonna get it six times as worse!")
Viewers must have found something infectious about the hiccupy shooting style, and the background music that telegraphs (if by "telegraph" you mean "whacked in the head by a two-by-four") the tone of each scene - comic, emotional, outrageous, dramatic - so viewers never have to give the show more than a fraction of their attention.
Whatever, "Jersey Shore" caught on big, attracting nearly 9 million viewers at its peak.
At the same time, it undid decades of headway by Bruce Springsteen in ennobling his native state, forever cementing its status as a punch line. (Filming of the series wrapped before Hurricane Sandy, with its many victims and heroes, reminded everyone that New Jersey isn't defined by a handful of camera-crazy beachside interlopers.)
The show didn't do a lot to burnish the image of Italian-Americans, either, as the cast let it all hang out with time-worn stereotypes. (Deena Nicole Cortese: "It's like fingerprints: How are you going to tell a guidette apart without her extensions?")
And it made the cast members - with skills barely advanced beyond strutting, scrapping, carousing and mangling the King's English - into stars. Thus were these high-wattage dim bulbs instantly deprived of their last shreds of authenticity as nobodies with nothing to lose, their status at the outset of the series.
Now the housemates of "Jersey Shore" can look back proudly at their accomplishments. They have all done their part to lower the bar, even as they stumbled over it.
And they have enjoyed a dream job. They got paid to party. And the bigger the spectacle they made of themselves, the greater their appeal and, presumably, the fatter their paychecks. (Paul "DJ Pauly D" DelVecchio: "One minute you got three girls in the Jacuzzi, the next minute somebody's in jail.")
But the time has come to say goodbye. Or not.
The Season Two premiere of "Snooki & JWoww" (starring "Jersey Shore" alumnae Nicole Elizabeth "Snooki" Polizzi and Jenni "JWoww" Farley) is just around the corner. From the press release: "Fans will see Nicole prepare to become a first-time mom, from nesting to going into labor and ultimately, get to see the first footage of her new son, Lorenzo." That's Jan. 8. Mark your calendar.
And in the indeterminate future, MTV plans to launch "The Show with Vinny," which MTV calls a hybrid talk/reality show that "will shatter the typical talk-show format by taking the biggest celebrities out of the studio and into Vinny Guadagnino's family home in Staten Island, N.Y." Alas, certain members of this cast could have the half-life of plutonium.
Meanwhile, MTV is moving ahead with a new gang of wild-and-crazy kids. "Buckwild" premieres Jan. 3 with a group of nine rebellious twenty-somethings living in West Virginia.
That's all ahead. But looking back as "Jersey Shore" exits, the question persists: Why?
Maybe people watched "Jersey Shore" because it was a welcome, wacky liberation. A break from the confines of parents, kids, partner, boss. Within their world, the "Jersey Shore" housemates have been privileged to serve as your surrogate id, treating you to visions of irresponsibility while sparing you from its costs - whether embarrassment, a hangover or an STD.
Call "Jersey Shore" a train wreck, then, albeit with no casualties. But does that beat a show that really takes you somewhere?
That's what I hear, again and again, when I ask people why they watch "Jersey Shore."
"It's such a train wreck!" they chortle.
I nod blankly and change the subject.
Am I missing the essential train-wreckiness that has made "Jersey Shore" such an audience-pleasing, buzz-generating hit? Or is my immunity to its charms explained simply by the fact that if I wanted to watch a train wreck, I'd choose a swifter railroad?
But this will all be moot soon. After three years and six seasons of boozy, rowdy wrecktitude, "Jersey Shore" concludes its MTV run Thursday at 10 p.m. EST.
Can it really be just three years since Snooki and memes like "smoosh" and "G.T.L." drilled their way into our consciousness? Since a group of millenial party animals challenged Speaker of the House John Boehner as the nation's reigning orange public figure?
Did Barbara Walters really include the "Jersey Shore" gang among her "10 Most Fascinating People" list in 2010? (Did she figure that the full cast of eight might add up to a single fascinating person?)
These, and so many other questions, will be deferred for anyone who might be mulling them, after Thursday.
For the moment, it suffices to just marvel at this phenomenon, which convened these housemates - four brawny dudes, four bosomy gals - at the Jersey Shore (and elsewhere as the series wore on), then, with cameras rolling, turned them loose to be themselves and get their dumb on.
There's been plenty of G.T.L. (gym, tanning, laundry) during the show's run. Plus drinking and messing around, of course, and random stabs at verbal self-expression. (Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino: "I got the shirt, but I ain't wearing the shirt when I go out. This is the shirt before the shirt.")
I can guess why anthropologically inclined viewers might have taken to "Jersey Shore." Here is an opportunity to study a primitive life form as it feeds, mates and struggles to communicate. (Ronnie Ortiz-Magro: "Why do you even bother? You're only gonna get it six times as worse!")
Viewers must have found something infectious about the hiccupy shooting style, and the background music that telegraphs (if by "telegraph" you mean "whacked in the head by a two-by-four") the tone of each scene - comic, emotional, outrageous, dramatic - so viewers never have to give the show more than a fraction of their attention.
Whatever, "Jersey Shore" caught on big, attracting nearly 9 million viewers at its peak.
At the same time, it undid decades of headway by Bruce Springsteen in ennobling his native state, forever cementing its status as a punch line. (Filming of the series wrapped before Hurricane Sandy, with its many victims and heroes, reminded everyone that New Jersey isn't defined by a handful of camera-crazy beachside interlopers.)
The show didn't do a lot to burnish the image of Italian-Americans, either, as the cast let it all hang out with time-worn stereotypes. (Deena Nicole Cortese: "It's like fingerprints: How are you going to tell a guidette apart without her extensions?")
And it made the cast members - with skills barely advanced beyond strutting, scrapping, carousing and mangling the King's English - into stars. Thus were these high-wattage dim bulbs instantly deprived of their last shreds of authenticity as nobodies with nothing to lose, their status at the outset of the series.
Now the housemates of "Jersey Shore" can look back proudly at their accomplishments. They have all done their part to lower the bar, even as they stumbled over it.
And they have enjoyed a dream job. They got paid to party. And the bigger the spectacle they made of themselves, the greater their appeal and, presumably, the fatter their paychecks. (Paul "DJ Pauly D" DelVecchio: "One minute you got three girls in the Jacuzzi, the next minute somebody's in jail.")
But the time has come to say goodbye. Or not.
The Season Two premiere of "Snooki & JWoww" (starring "Jersey Shore" alumnae Nicole Elizabeth "Snooki" Polizzi and Jenni "JWoww" Farley) is just around the corner. From the press release: "Fans will see Nicole prepare to become a first-time mom, from nesting to going into labor and ultimately, get to see the first footage of her new son, Lorenzo." That's Jan. 8. Mark your calendar.
And in the indeterminate future, MTV plans to launch "The Show with Vinny," which MTV calls a hybrid talk/reality show that "will shatter the typical talk-show format by taking the biggest celebrities out of the studio and into Vinny Guadagnino's family home in Staten Island, N.Y." Alas, certain members of this cast could have the half-life of plutonium.
Meanwhile, MTV is moving ahead with a new gang of wild-and-crazy kids. "Buckwild" premieres Jan. 3 with a group of nine rebellious twenty-somethings living in West Virginia.
That's all ahead. But looking back as "Jersey Shore" exits, the question persists: Why?
Maybe people watched "Jersey Shore" because it was a welcome, wacky liberation. A break from the confines of parents, kids, partner, boss. Within their world, the "Jersey Shore" housemates have been privileged to serve as your surrogate id, treating you to visions of irresponsibility while sparing you from its costs - whether embarrassment, a hangover or an STD.
Call "Jersey Shore" a train wreck, then, albeit with no casualties. But does that beat a show that really takes you somewhere?
Shows with gross people like this, is one of the reason I've not watched tv in over a dozen years. Do own a monitor to stream Netflix though. You can thank MTV for bringing corporate music to tv and ruining music by catering to the masses. Then they further methodically continue dumbing down America with inane repulsive shows like this.
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Wish MTV would end their reign of terror period.
I remember when MTV was about the music videos instead of the stupid crap they show now.
 @The WA Mama They simply changed the meaning of the 'M' from Music to Moronic.
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@deadcandance Those were the days!
GOOD! Now if only they could've done this somewhere around episode 2 to save everybody the trouble!
MTV was great when I was a kid. We had shows like Aeon Flux and Jon Stewart. Now it's Jersey Shore and that hillbilly show and shows glorifying teen moms.
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If you want your kids to grow up to be worthless brats, park them in front of MTV.Â
 @lakeview When I was a kid, we had...wait for it...music videos! :-)
 @JAK That was back when music was meant to be an art form not about money.
 @JAK It sounds like such a novelty now......I miss it.
Wow - maybe it is the end of times! A TV show of this caliber going off the air!?
Time to load them on the short bus and drive them over to the MENSA headquarters.
Awesome never watched it.
Huh, I didn't even know the show was still going. Haven't ever seen any of it either.
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3 years without any television in the house has meant my 'pop culture' intake is low. Somehow I don't feel deprived.
 @theToucan http://www.theonion.com/articles/area-man-constantly-mentioning-he-doesnt-own-a-tel,429/
What ever will they do for a job? No skils, little education, and an obnoxious attitude only make you eligilbe for reality show tv jobs. I wonder if they can collect unemployment until the next gig.
 @Cinn I didn't have a clue so I did a little searching, obviously you don't have a clue either.  First, they made up to 100,000 per EPISODE.  Some have successful careers before, during, and after the show, college degree's, one of them took the LSAT's.  It's a TV show for crying out loud.  How are they much different from other actors or celebrities?  Did you bother to educate yourself before spouting off?
Thank you for setting me straight. You can now move on to researching the accuracy of my Kardashian comments, if you like. I don't think I spouted, but wrote calmly. There was no added tone.
Don't assume...I'm sure you'll look up the meaning.
 @Cinn I'll just assume it was just as stupid and lacked any actual knowledge of the individual.
Oh, darn. This was such a super show!
(Wow, that was hard to say without gagging.)
Glad this is coming to an end. Â Hope these fools saved their money,. Â
I can't wait to hear about the casualties of life of these worthless people. Too bad that the girl on the end, I think is referred to as a snooki, opted to keep the baby instead of giving it to a worthy intelligent couple to raise it. Good riddance.
Thank god, however I'm afraid there is just going to be a new run of retards to ruin another generation.