Suicide shows hidden wounds of returning soldiers

Suicide shows hidden wounds of returning soldiers

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Story Published: Oct 10, 2008 at 5:04 PM PDT

Story Updated: Nov 21, 2008 at 3:42 AM PDT

By Keith Eldridge

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PIERCE COUNTY -- A veteran of the war in Iraq took his own life last August, but his widow now wants us to share her husband's story with you. It's the story of the hidden wounds of many of our returning soldiers.

Kelly Barber says her husband Josh couldn't handle what he saw and did in Iraq.

"Josh struggled with the fact that he killed people in Iraq," she said. "He would tell me all he could remember was smelling death all of the time."

Josh's troubles began when he deployed to Iraq in 2004. He enlisted during peacetime in 1999 as a cook, but in Iraq he became a gunner.

"He thought he was going to hell because he killed people," she said. "I told him we could go to church, get spiritual help."

Josh was diagnosed with Posttraumatic Stress Disorder after leaving the Army.

The thing is, Josh was starting to get treatment for PTSD at the VA beginning last March. But then 5 months later, he came to the Madigan Army Medical Center parking lot dressed in his Army fatigues and took his life.

The treatment doctor at the Veterans Administration wrote that the suicide Aug. 25 is likely connected to posttraumatic stress Disorder.

Kelly wanted to share her story after seeing our report on Carmen Damiani - an active duty soldier who was getting treatment.

She says there needs to be more treatment for those no longer serving, but suffering hidden wounds.

"I think he was proving a point to the military," Kelly said. "That 'here is a soldier that you didn't help. I cried out for help how many times?' "

She believes a lot of soldiers and veterans are suffering the same hidden wounds and are in need of help, but the VA is just overwhelmed.

A benefit is set for Saturday night Oct. 11 at the Olympia Moose Lodge to raise money in Josh's memory for suicide prevention programs.

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